Thursday, November 29, 2012

Quote of the Day

"I think our competition today is anybody that competes for eyeballs and attention and produces non-fiction programming. News is about more than politics and war, we need to broaden that definition of what news is, while maintaining the standards of CNN’s journalistic excellence."

-- Jeff Zucker on his plans for the network now that he's been named chief of CNN Worldwide

And there you have it -- your first indication of what's almost certainly to come.

You know what counts as "non-fiction programming?" in cable?

TLC, E! and Bravo.

Notice he saves the "journalistic excellence" thing for last.

That's right, baby -- Jeff's back on top.


Anonymous said...

As a former CNN'er i think this is a terrible move - yet another nail in the coffin.

Upside though is at least this d-bag won't be running for public office any time soon. (as was rumored shortly after his ever so graceful exit from NBC)

jrm78 said...

So... that means Little Honey Muffintop will be doing commentary on the middle east meltdown? Because I can't think of anything more newsworthy than what comes out of some reality TV homunculus' mouth. How about Paula Deen showing some Syrian refugees how to deep fry some butter, since we're expanding the definition of newsworthy here.

CNNfan said...

Chez said, 'Notice he saves the
"journalistic excellence" thing
for last.

That "journalistic excellence" thing
you mentioned, is last but not least,
because it is the conjunction "while"
(meaning, "at the same time")
"maintaining the standards of CNN’s
journalistic excellence."

Not to mention, Conan O'Brien is doing
just fine on TBS.

Ernest.Hirsch said...

Seriously. Shut CNNfan down. He doesn't add anything. The conjunction "while" can also be used in "hanging yourself by the neck with a belt, while achieving orgasm". The former action is a huge unnecessary risk with basically the same pay-off if done another way.

Zucker is the auto-erotic asphyxiation without the erotic part. Or the orgasm. So what Zucker actually is, is choking yourself to death with a belt WHILE swinging nude in a hotel closet, only to be found by the Thai staff days later.

Amy said...

Perhaps he saved the best for last...

TheReaperD said...

Well Hirsch, you certainly earned the colorful analogy of the week award.

As far as CNNfan goes, he's the Bill Orvis White without the humor (whether Bill intended or not) but, it's your call Chez.

CNNfan said...

The people who make comments, while
speaking from experience, are always
the most interesting to read.

Say Ernest, instead of a belt while in a hotel closet,
why not a rope while getting arrested in Central Park?

Gotta get the last lick in while I'm not kicked out of here.

Just joking, Ernest. No offense intended.

Victor the Crab said...

Well CNNfan, you're plenty offensive enough.