Monday, June 04, 2012
Assistant Quote of the Day
"I’d be willing to bet that in no other city but Miami would the following quote appear matter-of-factly in a crime story: 'Rudy was not a face-eating zombie monster.' ... Is it the vibe of this place that promotes such a bounty of derangement, or do the deranged simply move here for the vibe?"
-- Carl Hiaasen, on the recent naked face-eating attack in Miami
First of all, I love Hiaasen -- he and the rest of the old guard at the Miami Herald were who I grew up reading and what made me want to become a writer and columnist. Second, he's absolutely right. When I first heard that a naked guy had eaten the face off of a man in broad daylight on the side of a busy street, I wasn't even repulsed -- in fact, I kind of laughed, as morbid as that may sound. The reason? The minute somebody told me it that it happened in Miami, I just said, "Of course," having known for years that my hometown is the most batshit lunatic place on earth.
No matter how twisted, gruesome, flat-out weird or generally unbelievable you might think a news item is -- no matter how "WTF?" it may seem -- in Miami it's barely worth raising an eyebrow over. The place could not get any crazier. It simply isn't possible.