Friday, April 20, 2012

Reefer Madness

Happy 4/20, everybody!

Yeah, right -- fuck that nonsense. As a friend of mine said on Facebook this morning, if you're above the age of 19 and are excited that it's 4/20, kindly do us all a favor and kill yourself.

With that in mind, my latest piece for the Daily Banter is up and it's specific to this hallowed day in the life of every dipshit stoner you know and wish would just leave you the hell alone (because you likely don't care that he or she came into this really great batch of purple haze and is, like, so mellow right now). Over the past couple of weeks, if you pay attention to the podcast and my only occasionally active Twitter feed, you know that Bob Cesca, myself and a couple of other players have had a minor debate going back and forth over the good, bad and ugly of the pot-praising subculture in this country. Last week, we kind of left it at the fact that I merely wasn't into the whole thing and that it's simply a matter of opinion -- and that's true, to an extent. But I also do have a legitimate beef with those who loudly proclaim the wonder of weed -- and that's what today's piece deals with.

Despite my obvious distaste for stoner culture, I think it's pretty even-handed. Then again, you know what my idea of even-handed is.

Here's the opening shot:

"I’ve never been a big fan of smoking pot. Yeah, I’ve done it a few times, but being that I seem to have lived by the motto 'Go Big or Go Home' when it came to kicking off my storied career in drug use — diving directly into LSD and ecstasy rather than going through the various 'gateways' — I always kind of found pot smoking to be a bit anti-climactic. Great, so you laughed a lot and ate too much shitty food and were often forced to hang out with idiots who spent hours engaging in long-winded discussions that employed a lot of stoner logic. Sounds like a blast. That being said, I don’t begrudge anyone their habits as long as they’re not hurting anyone else in the process, and I accept unequivocally the absurdity of demonizing a plant simply because it happens to make people feel good; the political pressure to keep marijuana illegal amounts to nothing more than the senseless perpetuation of a puritanical blue law. If alcohol is legal I see no reason why pot shouldn’t be as well.

Over the past couple of weeks, though, Bob Cesca and I have had a little debate going on our podcast and radio show about the merits — or lack thereof, in my opinion — of the 'culture' of marijuana..."

Read the Rest at the Daily Banter


Bob said...

You should clear your head after thinking about this topic. I suggest 4:21 Air Freshener from Bubble Genius as an aromatherapeutic aid.

Chez said...

Hey, if the Bubble Genius ladies can use this hilariously stupid "holiday" to make money for themselves -- I'm all for it. I love their stuff and I love them -- I've made that very clear.

brite said...

Ah fuck Chez, I don't want to be one of
'The people who always have a dissertation ready on the history of hemp and how it’s different than the part of the plant that fucks up you.'
the history of hemp and its economy (in fact the one that helped create the nation you currently live in)is completely separate from the 'what gets you high issue' and you should know better.

Chez said...


J. Dack said...

I've been avoiding the 'net as much as I can today for this reason.

I smoke teh evil reefer on a pretty regular basis, but I have (and want) nothing what-so-fuckin-ever to do with pot culture.

Stoners ruin weed for the rest of us by making it part of their identity and it's fucking irritating.

I'm something of a professional drinker, but you don't see me slapping Jack Daniels patches on my backpack or giant posters of hops on my walls.

Anonymous said...

My only opinion on marijuana (and any drug, really), is that I'm upset that my tax dollars are being used in some absurd war on drugs. Legalize it, regulate it, tax it, and most everyone ends up happy.

And, I can stop paying the room and board of a whole lot of stoners who got caught by the cops.

Prophet of Ra said...

Remember, Chez, weed is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies.

Jadine said...

"if you're above the age of 19 and are excited that it's 4/20, kindly do us all a favor and kill yourself."


Chez said...

Yes, Jadine, really. I really want to see people killing themselves over this and am in no way making a semi-crass joke, the likes of which you find all the time around here.

JackDanieL said...

Semi-crass...the new contrarian prick

Anonymous said...

Dear Chez,

I think there's more to your story then meets the eye. You mentioned that you smoked pot only a few times... and I bet during those few times you were probably drunk and turned green, or not drunk and turned green, or probably didn't smoke enough...

shit where was I going with this?... oh yeah, that's right, I thinks you don't like weed because of what happened in the past dude.


btw, still love your stuff man. Keep it up.


Brett from Ojai said...

Then you never really experienced the wonders of fine sinsemilla. You can't just come on here and criticize what you know nothing about. We spend billions upon billions with this phony War on Drugs and look where it got us? And who is going to get us out of this mess? It certainly isn't going to be Mitt "Thurston Howell" Romney. And I'm sorry, Dude, but your man Obama is falling down on the job, too. Plus, Obama never really ended these illegal oil wars and he even expanded the military industrial complex. So, to hell with Obama and the Democrats who look just as conservative as the Rethuglicans. I'm voting Green this year, Dude. Screw that Obama. Green Party 2012.

Chez said...

I rest my case about how stupid pot use makes you.

Prophet of Ra said...

Yeah? Well, Brett, that's just, like, your opinion, man.

A Critic said...

"Then again, you know what my idea of even-handed is."

An ignorant rant against the sick and dying who are helped by something beyond your dim comprehension?

How about making a highlarious YouTube video where you find a chemo patient using a marijuana product and you yell at them about how awful they are and how the relief they are getting from the cancer and chemo is horseshit? It'll make you look REAL good!

Chez said...

And there. Now you got to get all that indignation off your chest. Feel better?