Saturday, February 18, 2012

Comment of the Week


Forever ago -- or at least last May, which seems like forever ago after drinking three glasses of absinthe at the Viper Room last night -- I posted a really weird conversation I had via Facebook message with a stranger who asked me to do him a favor: He wanted me to go into a CNN friend of mine's photo album and tag pictures of Kiran Chetry to a fan page he'd supposedly set up for her. This odd request, of course, immediately led to a lot of subtle and not-so-subtle mockery on my part aimed in his direction.

Needless to say, I didn't do what he asked. What I did do, though, was contact my CNN friend and find out if she knew anything about this guy; she quickly informed me that he was a Kiran Chetry foot-fetishist who'd been bugging her for months for shots of the (now former) CNN anchor's admittedly impressive feet and toes.

Well, it took almost a year to hear back from the Kiran Foot Worshiper, but I think he may have finally made himself known again. This is the anonymous comment I just got on the original post:

"Kiran chetry is so hot. Kiran should wear nude thigh hi stockings to work and have tall blk. Boots on. Kiran tied me down to her bed really tight and gagged me with a bar of yellow dial soap then wrapped ductape over my mouth and around my head a few times. Kiran comes back ten hours later and walks in with thigh hi stockings and boots only she had a whip and she unties my ankles then flips me over and my wrists are tied up behind my back. I got whipped hard for twenty minutes. That made me dig my teeth into the soap. It tasted horrible. Then kiran puts me face up and rode me. Hard then kiran chetry lays me on the floor.face up and she slid a boot off. Kirans stocking foot looked so sexy in nude thigh hi stockings. She did bith then finally kiran took the soap out if my mouth that I had almost swallowed and sucked on for twelve hours. She let me rinse. Kiran said the punishment didnt even start yet. I sucked on her stockinged feet for a while then she made me take care of her as she rode me again. Then kiran leaves and comes back with a bottle of ajax antibacterial soap a bucket and a sponge. Kiran drops the soap in the bucket and grabs the sponge and pours alot if ajax on it then puts the nozzle in my mouth and squeezed it.for ten seconds then washed my mouth out with soap for a while. Kiran moved the sponge in and out with soap and water for a longtime. Then kiran chetry put the bar of dial soap in my mouth and.scrubbed jt in and out for an hour. Kiran yelled at me and made me lick and suck on the soap then kiran pushed it around with her sexy toes then covered my mouth with her sweaty toes and wrapped ductape over her foot and around my head five times. Kiran went to sleep and said hope you figure out a wAy to breathe. I had such a hardon smelling her sweaty and knowing its been ductaped there to block soap.from coming out. Aftet about twenty minutes latet I started to struggle to breathe then I started swallowing lots of soap then I swallowed a bar of soap and I panicked and got too wound up from smelling kiran chetrys feet and she noticed and started pleasuring herself and she started to drip on me then she pinched my nose with her two toes and pulled a pair of pantyhose over my face and her feet then I tried to yell for help but it was muffled by her feet then kiran said im gonna get you.more bar soap and then I shot my biggest load ever and she stood up and really shut off all air supply and told me to take one last sniff of her feet and I did then I passed out."

So, yeah. I guess from now on you can feel free to send your XXX Kiran Chetry foot fan fiction my way.

And if this comment was the first thing you read on this Saturday morning -- you're welcome.

13 comments:

Mary Beth said...

That was somehow even better than I thought it would be.

Can I interest you in some Wolf Blitzer slash?

Riles said...

Didn't realize you counted Patrick Bateman as one of your readers.

And yellow Dial soap? This guy has lost it.

Chez said...

It is pretty Bateman-like in its detail, isn't it.

Riles said...

Amusingly (alarmingly?) so. When Breitbart is drunk he can be pretty twisted. This is too creative for him though.

Anonymous said...

Oh god they have a wiki

http://www.wikifeet.com/Kiran_Chetry

pea said...

Thank jebus it was Dial soap.

brite said...

Never let it be said you don't keep your promises Chez. That was, by FAR, the funniest thing (also, kinda creepy) that I've read all week.
Then again, I lead a sheltered life.

Anonymous said...

I'd crawl through a mile of her shit to get within an inch of her ass!

Chez said...

As I've said before, Kiran is indeed a really, really gorgeous woman. No doubt about that. Can't say she'd drive me to pull an Andy Dufresne or write fucked-up fetish fan-fic, but she's a stunner.

Claude Weaver said...

Huh so many jokes coming to me.....I need some time to craft epic comment that expresses all possible feelings...

kanye said...

This is like Molly Bloom's soliloquy meets Jame Gumb.

Anonymous said...

I'd love to.be forced to smell Kiran chetry sweaty pantyhose feet after she worked all day and suck her.toes..kiran chetry can make me suck on a bar of soap if.i.mis behave.

Anonymous said...

lol, wow. i cant imagine a guy would like that? Im curious if Kiran Chetry read this? Kiran should wash this guys mouth out with soap for leaving a note like this. I hope he does get punished by Kiran Chetry on live tv. she makes him smell her feet after she is just about off the air. she slides her heels off and makes this guy smell Kirans swesty pantyhose feet then she has him sit down as she rubs soap around his mouth snd embarass him. Someone should?