Thursday, November 17, 2011

Smashing Dawn


What with the latest installment in the terminally awful cultural affliction known as the Twilight series assaulting the theater-going public tomorrow, I figured I'd pass along something truly special to you nice people.

If you've got a spare 45 minutes or so -- and really, that's about how long it'll take to get through this thing -- I highly recommend reading the gramatically challenging but shockingly insightful take down of the entire Twilight phenomenon penned by -- well, the Hulk.

Really, for the most part this is a dead-on peeling apart of what makes the books and the movies so insidious -- not to mention shitty entertainment.

Bad-Ass Digest: Film Crit Hulk Smash: Hulk vs. Twilight/11.17.11

5 comments:

Anonymouse said...

Chez, you and everyone turning their noses up at Twilight are missing something huge...

If anyone has ever been a fan of Mystery Science Theater 3000, I suggest you look up Rifftrax. Pretty much Mike Nelson, Crow, and Servo are alive and well as all three of them, along with celebrities every so often, riff on gloriously bad movies. All you do is purchase the download and easily sync up the audio track to the film...and its like MST3K NEVER LEFT!!!

Its the only way to watch Twilight, Wickerman, Battlefield Earth...etc.

Sorry...don't mean to be a whore for those guys but its really worth looking into. The guys are hilarious.

Busayo said...

You should look over at das_sporking on LiveJournal for what might be the best Twilight book analysis/MST-ing/take-down on the Internet right now. A lot of what Hulk mentions gets really looked at there, and the layers of complete batshit and fail in those books are astonishing and depressing.

I tend to stay the hell away from the Twilight fandom, though. When they'd cast the little girl that's going to be playing the Deathbaby, there were people complaining that she looked too old for the role. The role in which her character (her character who physically ages rapidly but doesn't develop mentally at the same rate, and who will physically 'mature' when she looks 17, meaning she will always look underaged anyway) is going to be in a romantic relationship with an eighteen-year old werewolf who looks like a thirty-year old.

And the Twifans complained that the actress they picked isn't young enough.

tonyl said...

Chez, I thought FCH was wonderful, thanks for the link. But where do you find these things?

thanks for sharing, tony

Chez said...

All over. Twitter, Facebook friends, general wandering around.

IrishGirl said...

You know when I read the first Twilight book and watched the movie my instinctual response was very similar to Hulk's. WTF!!!! If my daughter ever sees/reads this crap you can be sure we will have a major sit down. It's bad enough that little girls have this kind of messaging pushed at them night and day by our society but to have it celebrated as much as Twilight is....it makes me feel physically ill. It is the exact opposite of what we should be telling young women in this country.

Also as a side note, not to pick on Mormonism or anything, but one of their basic tenets is that women cannot be saved UNTIL they marry a Mormon man in good standing with the church AND UNLESS that husband stands up and tells God that his wife is worthy of heaven. So the fact that Bella has no value except for her relationship (consumption) with (by) Edward, fits right into that effed up idea. Hulk was right, its pure "Id spew".