Thursday, September 29, 2011

Quote of the Day, Jr.


"We're glad that Mr. Wickersham is going to be OK, but we do hope that after this painful and frightening experience he will consider the terror and pain fish feel when they are impaled and suffocated to death. Maybe he will consider taking up another pastime."

PETA spokesperson Ashley Byrne, referring to a San Francisco man who was attacked by a shark while spear-fishing last weekend

The attack was the impetus for PETA's latest contrivedly shocking ad campaign; that's it above.

For what it's worth, I'm not sure even a shark would bother eating a vegan since I have to imagine they taste terrible. But I do love the implication that maybe if this poor bastard hadn't been out fishing the shark probably would've given him a pass. Love to test both theories by tossing a bunch of vegans into a tank full of great whites somewhere.

Also, I have a fantasy that involves Ingrid Newkirk and a plane-load of PETA personnel crashing in the Andes and being forced to resort to cannibalism.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

If you refuse to consume animal products for reasons of health, environment, etc, that is fine. But much of PETA’s argument of alleviating animal suffering comes from a narrow social economical class that enjoys a level of food security only recently obtained and enjoyed by very few (compared to the entire world population). Not that eating meat is the answer, but you can’t berate someone for not thinking of the ethical consequences of their meal when it is the one they are lucky enough to get every day.
In fact the entire fight over the “ethics of eating” seems to be between a small, rather privileged group of the world population that has so much food it can decide what is ethical to eat and what is not.

kanye said...

Sharks may not be thrilled with the idea of eating vegans, but usually, they'll do it...often they'll hesitate; but usually, they'll do it.

It helps if the vegan has been drinking large volumes of pineapple juice.

NoxiousNan said...

Chez, I think you've got it all wrong. We like corn fed beef, and the best piggies are the coddled, fruit and veggie fed (I know) over the store bought, cannibal variety. I feel this is clear evidence that vegans will be tastier than the average omnivore.

TheReaperD said...

I somehow suspect that PeTA members would have far less trouble eating people given how they treat their members and volunteers. Now, if their plane crashed and there was a case of large cuddly bunnies, then I would laugh my ass off.

Stephen said...

I don't know Nan...I tried smart dogs last week and although I found that, if slathered with the right condiments going in, they were passable. Going out on the other hand was a complete nightmare. I can only imagine what a vegan would do to a shark's bowels.

CNNfan said...

Did the PETA spokesperson consider the terror and pain fish feel when they get eaten by bigger fish, which then gets eaten by a shark, and ends up as ➪ Shark Poop ?

Jeremy said...

@ Nan and Stephen;

Too true. Cows are vegans, and they are delicious. (In fact, that should be part of the Beef Council's new ad campaign. "Cows. All the great vegan flavor, none of the pretense.")

Anonymous said...

How delishously devilish!

I'm o.k. with the concept of veganism, just not all of the self righteousness of it all.