Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Countdown To Rapture: 4 Days
Yet another friendly reminder that you only have four days to live.
Well, not really to live, since there will still be 153 days of torment following this Saturday -- the date of the Rapture -- but you get the idea.
I'd say that by now you should have made out your last will and testament, but let's face it -- it isn't going to do anyone any good since there won't be anything on Earth to leave behind for those not immediately ushered off to heaven. I mean, besides you. (Get it? "Left behind?" A little Armageddon humor for you there.)
Worth mentioning, though, is that a lot of people are planning post-Rapture parties, which if nothing else should be hedonistic bashes of heretofore unseen debauchery since, really, what has anyone got to lose anymore after the quakes strike at 6pm on May 21st? Check Facebook for details. Oh, and speaking of the exact time of the end, remember to pay close attention to CNN -- or, actually, Fox, now that I think about it, seeing as how it's always the Apocalypse on that network and they're the most self-righteous anyway -- all day Saturday to watch as God's wrath moves across the face of the Earth, beginning in New Zealand. (So long, Kiwis!)
All in all, you may as well come to terms with what's about to happen. Don't fight it -- just have fun. And here's a little something to get you in the mood for eternal damnation -- compliments of the Oak Ridge Boys.
(Video h/t Christian Nightmares & The Daily Swarm)