Thursday, October 28, 2010

Lust Tea Lady


To everyone who's sent this little item to me since this afternoon (and by the way, this thing may hold the record for being spread virally faster than just about anything that's ever hit the net; it was everywhere in a matter of a couple of hours): Yes, I've seen it and no I don't have too much to say about it.

Gawker: I Had a One-Night-Stand with Christine O'Donnell/10.28.10

Gawker's officially the lowest rung on the yellow internet journalism ladder after going ahead and posting such prurient, relatively unreliable crap (which Denton could care less about because he and his unholy creation are now the center of a media feeding frenzy). And who really gives a damn if it's true anyway? So Christine O'Donnell may have gotten drunk and tried unsuccessfully to get laid three years ago? Jesus, I do that every Saturday night. I couldn't care less what O'Donnell or anybody else does in his or her -- or someone else's -- bedroom. She's an attractive woman; let her slap a hand over Jesus's mouth once in awhile so he can't complain and just have a little fun. It's not like there's even any schadenfreude to be mined from this because you had to figure that someone repressed enough to decry masturbation would be a goddamned sexual time-bomb.

Look, if it didn't happen, Christine O'Donnell should just shrug off the pictures and the story because, as Hitchens says, what can be asserted without evidence can be disproved without evidence. If it did happen -- hey, good for her. Either way, so what.

Besides, who's to say the story wasn't planted by her anyway? It's the perfect ploy to simultaneously humanize, martyrize and sexualize a candidate who for the most part has been portrayed as nothing but a prudish laughingstock.

Denton and Gawker just handed her the kind of sympathy she'd normally have to contract cancer to get -- five days before election day.

I mean, hell, even I can't help liking her a little bit right now. Although it could just be the ladybug costume. I'm into that sort of thing.

12 comments:

VOTAR said...

Yeah I'm ashamed to say that I think she is sorta cute.

But I'm sorry, now I can't look at her from now on without thinking of a disheveled unruly bush. I mean it fits all the other medieval anachronisms about her, but come on, it's the 21st century. Pick up a Cosmo magazine or something, barbarian.

kanye said...

This approach is right out of propaganda 101: shoot the messenger. Is Denton using this to put on the resume he's sending to F a u xnews?

I won't get in to detail here: But this invigorated screed distorting, caricaturing and demonizing O'Donnell is predictable. It a familiar tactic in the conflicts going on in the battleground of the media. Now it and its mouthpieces are trying to make the farcical claim that O'Donnell's exposures will harm her election efforts. Excuse me while I take leave to laugh at the laughable.

In short, this piece is another hit job.

paleotectonics said...

Goddammit VOTAR, nothing beats fur. I mean, enough to make a funky sweater out of. Angora groundhog time. I'm thinking of one of those Not-Another-Scary-Movie films where the teen dude, gets the virginal heroine's pants open and goes in with a weedwhacker and safety goggles. I want to hear lions and monkeys. I want BUSH oooh Christ, YES!

She's nuttier than a Pearson's factory, should be arrested, WILL be committed, but damn, I have never been so attracted to someone right now!

(heeheehee)

Chez said...

You know, as much as I hate to admit it I completely agree, Paleo (about the attraction, not necessarily the bush). The original last line of this post was gonna be: "Hell, if my penis could pull the lever, I'd probably vote for her."

But then I thought that was sexist.

So I'm saying it here.

Eric said...

I'm a little chastened to admit I followed the link to read the story out of a purely prurient interest (no shame, VOTAR: O'Donnell isn't "sorta cute," she's a pretty attractive woman, at least physically speaking).

And now I'm a bit surprised to say that I do have thoughts about and a response to the story: if the story is true, the author is a total douchebag. I mean, we're clearly not talking about a gentleman just from the kiss-and-tell context of the story, but you add in some of the comments about O'Donnell's age, etc., and we learn a helluva lot more about the writer than we do the subject. We learn that the anonymous-coward author should have adopted the pseudonym "Mr. Summerseve." We learn he's a real class act. We again learn it's possible to hope that something moderately bad happens to a total stranger, nothing really debilitating, but maybe something that indicates karma is paying attention. We learn that being a complete dick remains one of the last nonpartisan vistas left to American culture and politics.

(Also, since everyone else has said something... at the risk of over-sharing, let's just say I think there's a lot to be said about that 1970s Playboy look and leave it at that. Glad to know I'm apparently not alone.)

Peter L. Winkler said...

The story, if true, is relevant, given O'Donnell's silly anti-sex league campaign against masturbation. Also, she's a fatuous idiot, and quite frankly, more than deserves all the ridicule she can get.

paleotectonics said...

@Eric,

Yeah, this guy really does deserve to get his douchebag ass kicked. As far as Gawker's/Denton's actual intentions re: this dumbass article, who knows, kanye may have hit the mark and this is an audition for the Faux agit-prop/disinfo division.

She is bat-shit crazy, but yeah, I can see feeling a bit sorry for her, and she's in waaaay over her head.

Vegetable rights and peace-out.

Chez said...

Peter, she deserves ridicule because she's a moron -- not because she wants to fuck.

Paleo, bonus points for the Young Ones reference.

Anonymous said...

I don't want her representing me in congress if she can't do a better job picking her one-night stands.

Eric said...

Chez, did you see the Village Voice's reaction: "EXCLUSIVE: I Got Blueballed by This Famous-Ass Chick, Yo"?

Kevin Davis said...

@Anonymous

Bill Clinton did a shitty job of picking his one-night stands and I still think he was a great president.

Vermillion said...

Man, been a while since I have kicked around here.

And, knowing how much of a degenerate I am, I skip over all the political junk to comment on the salacious post about attractive women in fetishistic outfits. I am nothing if not dependable.

I am still quite confused as to how you can have a "one-night stand" with no sex. Then again, I don't understand why some folks don't like masturbation either. I am not Dr. Ruth, people.

So, in conclusion, hello again, and I may or may not go and....do things involving these photos that she may or may not appreciate.

I wonder if she has a Girl Scout uniform....