Monday, June 07, 2010

Lust Cause


I have to admit that when I first heard the story of Debrahlee Lorenzana I couldn't help but be a little curious.

For those who haven't been paying attention, Lorenzana is the woman who's apparently so sexy she was fired for it. She claims that she lost her job at Citibank in New York because her bosses considered her looks a distraction. They supposedly banned her from wearing certain kinds of clothing -- a lengthy list which, according to her, even included turtlenecks -- but eventually realized that nothing could suppress her overwhelming hotness. And so, for the sake of salvaging their marriages and, one would imagine, the self-esteem of the average, non-Olympian women working in the office -- they finally just had to can her outright.

This morning, Lorenzana made the rounds on the morning news shows, with her predictably insufferable lawyer in tow (she's now suing Citibank) and of course I had to tune in, since I hadn't yet gazed upon this temptress with my own eyes.

I'm glad I did -- because it was comedy bloody gold.

Yeah, she's very pretty. No doubt about it.

And then -- she opens her mouth.

36 comments:

Amy said...

I have a sudden urge to watch West Side Story.

ahamos said...

Uh, dude, it doesn't matter how intelligent her words are--she delivers them with an accent. Did you miss that? Or perhaps the Catwoman suit she's wearing at 1:44? wow

In all seriousness, though, she may sound like an idiot here, but I'd be curious to know how she sounds on banking. Hard to judge based solely on this, but yeah: HOT.

Kel said...

Maybe she sounds more literate in Spanish?

Anonymous said...

What's wrong with the way she speaks? It's just how I imagine you to speak Chez.

Milton said...

what's so funny about it? just because she has an accent and has difficulty expressing herself in english? she is hot though.

Eric said...

Did her lawyer know he was going on national television when he threw those clothes on? Not to mention how happy he looks to be there at all....

oskar said...

Coming soon to a reality show near YOU!

This looks more like an audition to me.
Is Celebrity Apprentice still going?


ha hahaha: My word verification is "pigness"

Roket said...

I feel her pain. You wouldn't believe how many times I've been fired for being too sexy for my pants also too.

Withnail said...

I don't get it. She's not the brightest bulb in the drawer, but what's your point? She's not that smart? All hot girls are dumb?

Are you saying that she's lying?

Adrienne Saia said...

I've been perturbed by this since her insipid story broke. A capitalistic company in an industry dominated by men fired a hot chick who was totally up to par on performance?

I call bullshit on this one.

Krissy said...

My only question is, where did all the posed and well-lit photos of her come from? Did she have a photo shoot of her office attire or does citibank have a roaming photographer on staff?

Chez said...

It's all about that Nuyorican accent. You can work downtown on the 63rd floor of a sprawling office building (and look gorgeous doing it), but the second you open your mouth and that nasally whine comes out, you may as well be standing on a street corner in Washington Heights wearing big gold nameplate earrings and jeans four sizes too tight.

motheralex said...

Real Housewives of Citibank!

SteveR said...

The Latina Sarah Palin?

Vermillion said...

you may as well be standing on a street corner in Washington Heights wearing big gold nameplate earrings and jeans four sizes too tight.

Again, what is wrong with that?* Can she help that she is what the philosophers call a "brick....HAAAAAWSE"? The lady is stacked (it is a fact), and she cannot hold anything back.

But on a more serious tip, what the hell was Citibank thinking? As stereotypical and somewhat sexist as it may sound, I get the strong feeling that other women were more involved in this decision than men were.

I mean, as a man, it makes no sense. Unless you are a drolling imbecile that doesn't know the meaning of the word "no", you should be able to take in the sights without being offensive or harassing her. And if some jackhole did do that, then fire HIM. Don't ruin it for everyone else!

I have no idea if I made sense. My brain is kinda low on blood after seeing that video.


*Note: this question does come from a unabashed Rosie Perez lustgoblin.

Dr. Squid said...

So when will she get booked for Howard Stern's show?

Alanna said...

HA HA I just I cannot this is too funny. Amy - that's hilarious!

Chez hit it with his description of the accent/tonal quality indicating how serious you're taken here. If I'm dealing with a family and planning their financial aid the second I pronounce anything in a Long Island-accent they pick it up and poke fun at me. We're all trying so hard to be bougeoisie on this island!

I'd also like to know where all these "sexy" professional shots came from. And...to be honest...I have seen a plethora of good looking women get on my 5 train going home when we stop at Wall St. She's pretty commonplace if you ask me.

Maybe she'll sit on a float at this Sunday's PR parade! Or perhaps just her tits will, since this is really all this is about.

B8ovin said...

I am so tired of women being held back because of their looks. It's bad enough when a newscaster gets too old and is no longer "camera friendly", but it's worse, much worse, when a woman does a good job and is fired just for being too "hot". These poor women never get anywhere in life, probably because of the matters that are going on.

Alanna said...

wayyyyyy paaa!

Anonymous said...

I have the same problem. I'm too hot to hold down a job.

--kw

CNNfan said...

I think there should be a law, that anyone who criticises an accent, should be required by law to learn to speak another language.

Then they will see for themselves how dumb it is to criticise an accent of someone else who has successfully learned to speak another language.

I had no problem at all with the way she expressed herself on TV in front of tens of millions of people.
With over 30 million Americans out of work, I think the courts are ruling "Performance Based" is termination without good cause in most cases.

VirginiaO'Possum said...

The punchline for me is Ms. Lorenzana's complaint that it keeps happening to her and she just wants it to stop. Trust me, wait a few years and it will definitely just stop. And then nobody will pay any attention to her at all. Might as well bitch about it on national TV whilst she can.
But what confuses me about the story is that in New York, lots of women with corporate jobs look and dress the way she does -- and plenty of them sound the way she does, too. That makes it hard for me to believe she was fired either for her looks or for the accent. But her lawyer is right -- plenty of people get fired for making complaints to HR.

The Imp of the Perverse said...

Is this woman attractive? Yes, extremely. But, as has been pointed out above, there are women who are WAY hotter working in offices all over Manhattan. I've had bosses who were more attractive than this woman, and their physical attributes didn't seem to hold them back any.

I call bullshit on her claims, and here's why:

As someone who grew up around people who speak with similar accents, I don't think this is the most illuminating aspect of Lorenzana's appearance on "Today."

It's not the accent -- it's the fact that she's inarticulate, which is usually an indicator of a less-than-sparkling intellect.

I mean:

"…the official reason was that because of the matters that were going on at the crisis center, the problems, which it was me notifying human resources …"

"Their exact words to me when they pulled me aside in the office, they said to me a list of the clothing items that i couldn't not wear…"

Let me put it this way: if my bank assigns to me someone who insists on saying "aks" instead of "ask," you can bet that I'm going to feel slighted, maybe even insulted, and I will take my (admittedly meager) business elsewhere.

Someone who chooses to speak that way simply isn't going to go very far in a corporate environment.

Mas Triste said...

You better close the door to your closet, your racism is seeping out.

If you have ever worked in an office, you know that the one person most despised by the female office staff is the hot one.

Assuming they had disciplined her over attire and no one else and then used the financial crisis as pre text to terminate her; she has a case.

Chez said...

Racism, eh? How long have you been coming here?

I'm always amazed at the specific little things each person chooses to be offended by.

Alanna said...

Imp made the case. It's not her accent, per se, but her grammar, inflection, argument, etc. That's not racism - it's the facts.

Le Penseur said...

It seems like you are kinda hitting below the belt on this one, and unnecessarily I might add, given everything Ms. Lorenzana gave you to work with.

Full Disclosure: I am an immigrant and I have first-hand experience of what it's like to be an object of mockery simply for having an accent.

Chez said...

I love it when people forget the line directly below the name of this site on the front page.

Once again, eventually, everyone will probably be offended by something I say. It's always amusing when somebody goes along with my silly little cheap-shots, only to then suddenly take umbrage when I hit on something that feels like a personal slight against him or her. They're just jokes, kids. Sometimes I write lengthy, esoteric analyses of the issues I feel strongly about; a lot of other times, I just make juvenile jokes.

Alanna said...

oh this is ... rich

http://gawker.com/5559301/hot-bankers-boob-implant-documentary-i-want-to-be-sex-on-a-stick

Mas Triste said...

Yeah, Chez, must've been the voice inflection...

"I have a sudden urge to watch West Side Story."

"Maybe she sounds more literate in Spanish?"

"It's all about that Nuyorican accent"

"Maybe she'll sit on a float at this Sunday's PR parade!"
?

I'm not offended in the least. Mockery is mockery, but if its' pretext to slam her for her failure to master the English language; own it.

Le Penseur said...

I take offense to the suggestion that I took umbrage towards your hate-speech. I was just saying that usually when you make fun of people it's for legitimate character flaws like being a moron or having a horse face...you know, stuff that has to do with who you are as a person rather than what country or culture you're from.

Chez said...

Hate speech. That's good.

And Mas -- you see me apologizing? I'm owning the hell out of it.

Amii said...

On the question of where did the photos come from, I'm guessing from a photo shoot she did with Village Voice.

In the comments of that VV article, there were many questions on the photos, alluding that VV had taken advantage of Lorenzana and that it wouldn't do her case any good. An editor then commented that it was Lorenzana herself that insisted on the sexy shots.

I doubt her end goal is a settlement, and she'll risk it for the fame.

Le Penseur said...

Chez, my second comment was written with tongue firmly in cheek. I don't really think what you said constitutes hate-speech, or even that having a horse face is a legitimate character flaw. While I may not have been amused what you said, I certainly do not believe it justifies calling you a racist.

Chez said...

: )

VirginiaO'Possum said...

I take back the first part of my original comment. The punch line here is the four-part Discovery Health documentary on her second surgical breast augmentation. Apparently she had not suffered "this kind of harassment" for enough of her life.