Monday, January 18, 2010
Quote(s) of the Day
"It's not rain, it's just God crying for NBC."
-- Tina Fey at last night's Golden Globes
"Let's get on with it before NBC replaces me with Jay Leno."
-- Ricky Gervais at last night's Golden Globes
"This week you didn't need Cinemax to see someone get screwed on TV. So how did NBC let it come to this? Well, I think I can explain it. Let's say you're married and it's the number one marriage in the country, but then you meet someone else who sweeps you off your feet, so you say to her, "I want to marry you, in five years," and she says, "Yes, I will wait five years to marry you." So then you go home and you tell your current wife, "Honey, in five years we're getting a divorce." Now you might think your current wife would be super cool with that and thank you for being honest, but it turns out she's actually super mad and as the five years pass she gets in really good shape. So when the time comes for the divorce, she's looking better than ever. She looks so good that you see other people looking at her and you get jealous, so you come up with an awesome plan: you'll still marry the second person, but you'll also stay married to the first. So you tell the new wife, "Good news! We're totally married, but every night when I get home I'm gonna spend a half hour with my first wife first -- but then I'm all yours." And before you even see how she feels about it, you hold a big press conference and tell people you've changed the future of marriage. Now if you think the new wife is cool with this plan, she's not. She's super mad. And the first wife is also acting weird because, you know, you have two wives. But then, just when you think you're stuck, you come up with a perfect plan to solve all your problems: You kill your second wife."
-- Seth Meyers on Saturday Night Live
Screw what NBC is saying publicly right now. There's no way the company's people at the top (or the bigshots at Comcast for that matter) are enjoying the constant barrage of abuse they're taking on their own network. For God's sake, last night the Governor of California took a shot at NBC live on NBC's air. I was honestly expecting that by the end of the Golden Globes show they'd lower little Jeff Zucker down into the middle of the ballroom like a pinata and give everybody baseball bats.