"I hope to hell that when I do die somebody has the sense to just dump me in the river or something. Anything except sticking me in a goddam cemetery. People coming and putting a bunch of flowers on your stomach on Sunday, and all that crap. Who wants flowers when you're dead? Nobody."
-- J.D. Salinger, 1919-2010
Genius is forever.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Last Writes
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10 comments:
Bummer, I thought he was already dead though. It just goes to show you that if you believe something long enough, it eventually comes true.
For instance, I believe that Sarah Palin will be shot and killed by a wolf in a helicopter.
#2 - Zelda "This House Is Clean" Rubenstein.
Who's next?
Well, shit. Even I, much-lamented hater of Holden Caufield, think this sucks.
What's hilarious is that Mat Devine -- the lead singer of Kill Hannah -- posted something on Twitter about how sad a day it is for "all the Holden Caufields like me."
Sure thing. Now I know why Salinger grew to hate Catcher. It became the Bible of self-important little assholes everywhere.
Another old writer, Howard Zinn, also passed away yesterday. He is famous with liberal history buffs. A little younger than Salinger at 87, Zinn is most famous for "Peoples History of the United States". For those not familiar he takes an interesting look at our country's history - from the perspective of the little guy and the losers, not the fat cats and the winners. If you are not afraid to work your way through a big fat history book, highly recommended.
Man, I'm putting that in my will, in fact, i think I'm just going to send it to my family by email and say, this is what to do with me. I'll be dead, so I don't care, and otherwise, mourn for a day, or week, or month, or whatever works for you and then move on. I hate cemetaries...waste of space. I'm all for a form of green burials though.
I want somebody to just put sunglasses on me, Weekend at Bernie's style, and prop me up in the back of the funeral parlor. Either that or just burn me and urinate on the corpse to put it out -- I don't care, I'll be dead.
I'm insisting on having my fresh corpse run through a chipper-shredder ("Fargo" style) and splattered onto a very large canvas so I will finally become the work of art everyone always unrealistically expected me to be.
If you haven't got anything nice to say... well, OK, he did write a couple of good things.
Great quote. I found even more respect for JD after reading in his obit that he served in WWII, married a young ex-Nazi named Sylvia, quickly got divorced, and from then on referred to her as "Saliva"...
Awesome.
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