Friday, January 15, 2010


Jeff Zucker may or may not eventually lose his job as the comically incompetent and breathtakingly smug CEO of NBC Universal, but thanks to the internets it hardly matters -- mostly because he's already dead.

Take a look at the screengrab above from Zucker's Wikipedia page yesterday. They are Anonymous, they are legion, and they will figuratively kill you.

Meanwhile, an interesting tidbit about the history of Jeff Zucker and Conan O'Brien is making the rounds. (It's been mentioned on both Time magazine's business blog and by Alex Pareene over at Gawker.) Apparently Zucker and Conan go way back -- all the way to Harvard. And apparently Zucker has always been a humorless, Napoleonic prick.

From a 2004 story in BusinessWeek:

"Too small to pursue his fantasy of playing football for the Miami Dolphins, Zucker took to writing local sports stories for The Miami Herald. He continued his writing career as an undergraduate at Harvard University, where he covered sports for The Harvard Crimson. He later became president of the publication. It was at Harvard that Zucker first met Conan O'Brien, now an NBC late-night host, who worked for humor magazine the Harvard Lampoon. As a prank, O'Brien's staff stole all the Crimson issues one day before they could be delivered. Zucker called the cops. 'My first meeting with Jeff Zucker was in handcuffs, with a Cambridge police officer reading me my rights,' says O'Brien."

Oh yeah, one more thing. I couldn't resist passing along a couple of really great Zucker-related jabs. First, when asked why he thought El Jeffe still had a job, Andy Borowitz, one of the funniest guys on Earth, said this: "For years there has been a commonly held theory that (he) has a video of GE Chief Executive Jeff Immelt cavorting with a goat, and he has threatened to put it on the air. But I think this is a far-fetched theory, since Zucker has never put anything interesting on the air."

Then there's this great crack that somebody posted on Twitter yesterday: "Of course Jeff Zucker got colon cancer -- it's the only kind of cancer an asshole can get."

For the record, I'm sorry to have insulted cancer by mentioning it in the same breath as Jeff Zucker.


Jeremy Feist said...

Oh lord...I have to admit, I'm a big fan of anonymous. They do the kind of shit I could only dream of. Kudos.

Matt Osborne said...

Vandalism is funny. Did I ever tell you about the time I put a warning sign on a rotting building? Embarrassed the hell out of the owners when it ran in the newspaper.