Monday, April 27, 2009

The Douchebag Apocalypse


This is not photoshopped.

Read about it here, and by all means take a shot at doing what I couldn't because as soon as I saw this my brain melted and ran out of my ears: caption this bitch.

Related: That Stupid Year: The Ten Most Ridiculous, Shameful or Generally Unfortunate People and Events of 2008/1.5.09

27 comments:

Anonymous said...

"Would you check out this blond I met dad?!!"

Matt Osborne said...

It's a trifecta of Hurrnnh?!

VOTAR said...

AAAAGH

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHH

AAAAAAAHHH

AAAH

AAAH


AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHH

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHH

Jeremy said...

GAH... the eyes! I just went to your link and saw the big version of this photo and my God... The vacant soulless eyes!

Fred said...

How much will you pay me to fuck the blonde? Which one? Who cares, just PAY UP!

britta is an asshole said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mas Triste said...

"You see, I told you I am not the stupidest fucker on the planet!"

Select your own attribution of the three.

slouchmonkey said...

Gotta make a livin, right?

Riles said...

"Bet you thought I couldn't get any douchier, didn't you!"

"Two Douches and a Leno-chin"

"Sssssssssthppp" (sound of the universe collapsing into itself)

Sue said...

And these are the top two bid...ahem...I mean, candidates for the Illinois Senate seat!

Julius_Goat said...

This is the one time that taking the picture stole the photographer's soul.

Anonymous said...

Tweedledee, Tweedledum and their pimp.

or//

You just know someone is going to get fucked.

Chez said...

Julius, for the win.

Girl With Curious Hair said...

Are there any alligators or swamp monsters in that water thing behind them? A rabid raccoon?

B8ovin said...

Ahem...vulgarian at the plate:
To fucking fake fucks with a fake fucked fucker. And somehow Sy-Fy movie star douche Stephen Baldwin wasn't the worst slice of shit in a shitty pop culture story of shit, he wasn't even in the top three, for Dog's sakes.

Smack, Cracker, and Punk said...

So the guy in the suit, did they steal him from a mortuary(probably spelled that wrong but the eyes have sucked the intelligence out of me with their vaccum from hell power.) or what? I have seen dead people with more life to them. I know I see a stick propping up that sucka.

Seth said...

This is clearly a truly gifted Wax Museum sculptor's final 'Fuck You' to the world before he takes his own life. If it's anything else, all is lost.

Deacon Blue said...

In yet another example of remake hell, ABC decides to revive the "Three's Company" franchise, but with the role of Jack Tripper to be recast as a Hooters waitress working her way through dental school, Chrissy to be recast as a coke-addicted male prostitute, and the role of Janet recast as a former East European gangster on the run from his past while he plans to run for a city council seat in Long Beach.

Chez said...

You rule, Deac.

chenry said...

This picture makes me wretch so hard I think I might be able to propel my intestinal tract a good 20 or 30 feet.

Deacon Blue said...

Well, Chez, it certainly helps when folks like you and Bunche provide such good material from which to work...

kanye said...

Former governor and current defendant Rod Blagojevich (pictured above, along with fellow castmates Heidi Montag--[Ali] and Spencer Pratt--[Dutch]) is thrilled to be playing the role of Sensei John Kreese in The Peoria Playhouse's upcoming production of The Karate Kid: The Musical.When asked about the pressures of tackling such an iconic role, the future inmate said, "Listen, I got the looks, I got the brains and I got the hair. Marty Kove was good, had good hair, but I'm gonna take this character to a whole new level. I got a hold of this role and I ain't lettin' it go. This role is fucking golden."

Tickets are available through the Peoria Jaycees.

Jeremy said...

I vote for Deacon's caption

Anonymous said...

God if I had to choose (and thank the powers that be that I don't) I'd rather fuck Blogogovichme rather than that fucking spaz Spencer. What the hell is wrong with Heidi?

Anonymous said...

I bet Heidi shags like a mynx

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britta is an asshole said...

original woodstock announcement (paraphrased):

"The brown acid that is circulating around us isn't too good. It is suggested that you stay away from that. Of course it's your own trip. So be my guest, but please be advised that there is a warning on that one, ok?"

the original woodstock soundtrack wound up making me think of a much more likely explanation for this picture than anything i could find in the book of revelation (or anywhere else for that matter).
"the terrorists" aka "what's left of the GOP" have contaminated our water supply with that pesky brown acid and we're all sharing this bummer hallucination. see you in the freak out tent! i hope i feel better before sha-na-na's performance. peace, man.