If Hannah Montana and High School Musical don't reignite the Cold War, nothing will.
The New York Times: The Disney Channel Coming to Russia/12.16.08
Update: Sky News profiles how Disney scouts are working to find the new Russian Hannah Montana.
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Mickey Muscovite
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7 comments:
Finally! Entertainment for my comrades childrens children!
I have to admit that I'm kind of looking forward to the Russian version of High School Musical -- where they do all that cool folk dancing then at the end the girls are sold into prostitution.
I don't think the Russians will do anything. They know that hydrogen bombs and heavy infantry stand no chance of defeating Miley Cyrus. After we're all wormfood she'll still be out there singing to the cockroaches. And after they're dead she'll sing to the bacteria in the goddamned volcanic ash that covers the sinking continents of our dying planet.
This is just spreading the End Times into Russia; this is only the beginning, now the Great Old Ones, in the guise of their spawn, Hannah Montana, will wrap their eldritch tentacles around the throats of the rest of the world, and it will be The End.
Translated into every language on Earth.
The End.
God help us all.
But wait. There is no God. Only Azathoth and Nyarlathotep!!
IA! IA!
Yeah, I can't wait till whatever actresses they round up go on the auction block. Wait, we are talking about once the movie is done filming, right?
The business channel ran a program on Coca Cola in Russia that said to sell things to other countries, American companies need to turn everyone else into Americans.
The Russian Hannah Montana? I wasn't aware Russia had the washed-up country music stars needed to father her.
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