Thursday, September 18, 2008

Sixteen Condoms

Great news for parents who worry that The Hills may not be enough to ensure that their daughters eventually wind up with a low IQ and an STD: Sex and the City for teens is coming!

Hack writer and badly dressed New York society cliché Candace Bushnell has announced that she's penning a series of prequels to her inexplicably successful book and TV series about the exploits of a hack writer and badly dressed New York society cliché named, imaginatively, Carrie Bradshaw. However, unlike the original Sex and the City, which was basically heroin for sad and loveless middle-aged women, The Carrie Diaries will focus on Carrie's life as a teenager -- making it basically heroin for one sad and loveless middle-aged woman: Bushnell, who gets to use the books to further her own self-mythology by pushing the notion that she was actually cool in high school.

As the "author" herself describes the new series:

"Carrie in high school did not follow the crowd -- she led it. It was there that she began observing and commenting on the social scene."

This will seem like a startlingly fresh and original concept to anyone who's never seen an episode of Gossip Girl.

Needless to say, The Carrie Diaries is already being made into its own television series.

Deus Ex Malcontent has obtained an exclusive preview:


Donal said...

Waitresses doing Square Pegs was OK, but always liked I Could Rule the World If I Could Only Get the Parts

m said...

VOTAR said...

Dude. That's a totally different head.


Harris said...

Has there been ever been anyone, anywhere who would describe themselves as "cool in high school" that was worth knowing as adult?

See You Next Tuesday said...


In short: No.

Chez said...

Did the Waitresses ever write a song where the verses actually rhymed?

Donal said...

Occasionally in Xmas Wrapping:

But most of the time, nope:

I'd forgotten how much I liked that album.

Amii said...

I'm still laughing about the labels.

It's important to me that your younger readers know that no one EVER dressed like that.

Colombo said...

ok I definitely call bullshit on this one... I'll give it to them that they managed to find a talking horse but there's no way they can make it look younger