As Hurricane Ike barrels torward Florida, a lot of folks are battening down and evacuating coastal and low-lying areas in an effort to escape the storm's wrath.
Totally unnecessary.
All Floridians have to do is appease the storm through a sacrifice and he'll leave them alone.
Step 1: Find Tina Turner.
Step 2: Take her to the Southernmost Point in the United States, in Key West, and tie her to the monument there.
Step 3: Stand back and let Ike "do his thing."
Otherwise, y'all better prepare for the biggest pimp-slap in history (after which Ike will stand over the rubble and shout, "Now look what you made me do!").
Saturday, September 06, 2008
Release the Crackhead
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8 comments:
That was so wrong, but so funny.
Whoa. Dude.
BWAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA
It's nice to know I'm not the only one who thought of Tina when they named the hurricane.
Not that I didn't keep it to myself, for the most part. But I thought it. *smirks*
I love Tina and I'm pretty sure she would be able to take Ike. She would lure him with her siren voice. She'd be thunder, he'd be lightning, and they'd collde on dry land.
And then she would cut him...
You're a sick fuck.
:-)
I said to my mother (who is worried about her winter house on the atlantic), "Ike will be the one, look what he did to Tina!" Great minds.
I didn't find Tina but I did get a couple of santeros to kill some chickens and we avoided a hit.
Release the Crackhead.
Holy shit I just got that.
I fucking hate you.
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