Monday, April 28, 2008

Achy Breaky Tart (Redux)



Oh, and it just keeps getting better and better.

(The Huffington Post: Miley Cyrus Poses Topless for Vanity Fair)

That sound you hear is parents screaming, pre-teen girls crying and pre-teen boys having their very first orgasms.

15 comments:

Paul said...

Chez, I think you might be more excited than any of those teenage boys.
Not because of the content of the picture but because you were right, she's a prosta-tot just like the rest of them.
Good call.
You can spot a teenage whore a mile away.

Anonymous said...

And now she's been doing the apologetic rounds about "those inappropriate internet photos".

Ms. Cyrus, please, listen: You do NOT have to. Got it? Do not feel sorry for being another natural, fucked-up person. Instead, do the opposite and go out apologizing about the whole artificial persona your PR machine has created for you. Because of that, now you can't be a person and kiss a dork, or get slightly drunk or screw up a bit. Drop all of this Montana thing and live a much simpler life.

Your decidedly non-fans,

The Rest

Anonymous said...

(The picture itself turned out quite beautiful, I think, pretty much reminding me of old painted portraits. Like when Toulouse-Lautrec would paint the whores of yore in Moulin Rouge.)

VOTAR said...

Mehh!...


I've soiled images of children far more provocative than this one.

Chez said...

Images?

You've soiled children.

kanye said...

They've made her look like Heath Ledger's Joker.

Master Mahan said...

Because this is too rich to make just one joke:

I'm shocked. I expected more of Billy Ray Cyrus's parenting skills.

That is one skinny girl. If she doesn't put on some weight, how are we supposed to tell when she starts using crack?

I'm glad to see Disney's Vice-President of Marketing to Pedophiles hasn't lost his touch since the Olson Twins.

At least teenage girls still have wholesome role models like Emma Watson. Wait, the time between her turning 18 and being photographed in semitransparent panties was how long?

Jamie said...

She looks like an extra from Les Miz. And a little busted-looking.

BV said...

She looks like the chick from the Ring and now we're all going to die.

Anonymous said...

She looks positively post-coital.

Ontario Emperor said...

At least she wasn't wearing the blonde wig. Although I don't think she'll be shaving her head a few years from now.

Laser Rocket Arm said...

I'm surprised a bigger fuss isn't being made about a picture taken of Miley and good ol' Billy Ray where Miley is draped VERY suggestively across Daddy's lap while they hold hands. That picture is FAR more disturbing than this one.

Richard said...

I can't wait for the "home video" to come out on blue ray!

Paul said...

It never ceases to amaze me how many retards here will claim she's a whore for a simple photo. You can't see anything. It was taken by Anne Leibovitz, one of the greatest photographers of our generation. It's an artistic shot done without makeup to show that a billionaire teen celebrity is no different than anyone else when you get down to the core of them.

And the shot with her father is not suggestive or sexual in any way. You people are the ones seeing it as sexual. That's your own sick minds at work.

Chez said...

Uh-huh, sure thing.

First of all, if that's without makeup then I need to get to an optometrist. Secondly, it's not art -- not even with Annie Leibovitz behind the lens -- it's commerce. No one's trying to make an esoteric statement about how Cyrus is just like everyone else; they're sexualizing her to sell magazines. Don't get me wrong -- I think this is a whole lot of nonsense about nothing, but the key here is intent. Everyone's selling this girl: Vanity Fair, her parents, Annie, Disney, even Miley Cyrus herself. And whether it's right or not, you can't take pictures like these and still claim to be a child icon -- and you damn sure can't have it both ways by taking them then turning around and pretending you had no idea what the hell they represented. Everyone involved in the shoot knew exactly what was going on and that although there would be nothing wrong with the photos themselves, they'd go against Cyrus's carefully crafted image.

That makes any apology nothing more than bullshit theater.