Thursday, August 16, 2007

King Me

Elvis Presley died on the toilet 30 years ago today.

As expected, thousands of the fanatically devoted have gathered in 100 degree heat and 937% humidity outside Elvis's timeless tribute to carpeted ceilings, mirrored walls and "Puddle of Sick"-green upholstery that's forever trapped the smell of fried chicken grease -- Graceland.

Let's meet a few of them, shall we?



Long live the King, and God bless America.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

So do you think that anyone will stand in the heat and humidity to hold a candle for you Mr Maladjusted? His name goes down through history....you will only be history.

Chez said...

If you don't mind me asking, who turned the computer on for you?

Dave said...

I'll answer the question for him, i did. He paid me 10 bucks to turn it on but said nothing about turning it off so.......

sleepygaby said...

Hmmm. Why "go down THROUGH history" instead of simply "going down IN history"? Also, is there even a difference between "going down through history" and "being history"? I mean, really, don't they just mean that we all eventually die?

Al said...

Straight up racist the sucker was simple and plain...mutha f*cking HATE John Wayne!

Anonymous said...

I know one thing for shit-sure. I'm not some single-minded, bend-me-over/knock-me-up Elvis jerking, idol worshipping, Yahtzee playing DOUCHEBAG..I am a fan of Chez but even Chez wouldn't want to come to his apartment and idol worship him unless I bring Jayne some really good mexican food.

Chez said...

It's actually "motherfuck him and John Wayne," but the sentiment was there.

Lorenzo said...

Nope. Not gonna do it. Not going to watch that. I fucking know it's going to be stupid redneck trailer trash after stupid redneck trailer trash and I fucking see enough of that at work every day. No. Not gonna do it.

Anonymous said...

Suddenly I feel a lot less sad for liking Harry Potter.

- Kara

Jayne said...

mmm... guacamole...

harris said...

On behalf of all the poor black musicians who died just as poor and black as the day this fat, rich thief ripped them off: Fuck you, douchebag.

Jennifer said...

Chill out folks. It's Elvis, not Dick Cheney. You can't hate him thaaaat much. Sheesh.

Is harris a poor black musician? Do poor black musicians (dead or alive) even want someone like harris, who says, "fuck you, douchebag" to a dead guy speaking on their behalf? Jackass.

mrmook said...

ELVIS IS DEAD?

NO F*****G WAY!

I saw him, like, the other night at the 7/11. I'm pretty sure....

Michael J. West said...

Wow. Playing around on the DXM archives I stumbled across this one. I kinda wish I'd seen it when it was new, so I could have told commenters like Harris -- and, in this case, Chuck D -- that they had no idea what they were talking about.