Friday, August 31, 2007

"I Can't Lie to You About Your Chances, but You Have My Sympathies."


As far as I'm concerned, Alien remains the single greatest movie ever made.

To say that I'm a fan of Ridley Scott's 1979 masterpiece -- its look, its feel, young Sigourney Weaver in her underwear, everything -- would be to sorely downplay my absolute obsession with the film and the entire canon it inspired.

I know more worthless trivia about the Alien series than any well-adjusted person should. I own a baseball cap with the original Nostromo insignia patch. I bought the Alien Quadrilogy DVD set, which includes a better cut of the unfairly maligned 1992 David Fincher sequel. I'm looking for a full-scale M41A Pulse Rifle (in case anyone happens to be stuck on what to get me for Christmas this year). I probably bleed molecular acid by this point.

It goes without saying then that, as a diehard fan of the Alien films and decent film in general, I'll never forgive Fox for diluting and consequently destroying the entire franchise by agreeing to allow Alien vs. Predator to ever see the inside of a theater. The fucking movie was blasphemy.

And now comes Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem.

When I learned that they were actually making a sequel to the original cinematic abomination, my first thought was that somebody needed to dig up Daryl Zanuck, then jetison the bodies of both him and Rupert Murdoch and make up any story they liked.

But then I heard who was directing it -- the Brothers Strause, two visual geniuses with a love of, and a respect for, the original movie and a serious knack for bringing disturbing imagery to life.

And then I saw the new trailer.

In a surprising and truly ballsy marketing move, our first look at the new movie comes courtesy of a notorious "Red Band" trailer -- meaning that the trailer itself is R-rated. It features shocking and graphic violence, and lets the audience know right off the bat that this time around, the gloves are off and the potential for chaotic gore that made the original films so startlingly effective is back.

Whether or not Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem will be decent is anyone's guess (and note the tip of the hat to Cameron's vision of the plural Aliens, further letting you know what you're in for).

One thing's for sure though -- at least it won't be PG-13.

See the red-band trailer here.

11 comments:

Alex the Odd said...

I was also seriously skeptical when a colleague came bouncing into my office and demanded I watch the trailer with him this very instant. And then I saw the trailer. And now I'm squeeing with delight. Still. If they can't make it a decent movie (which let's face it isn't looking too likely right about now) the least they can do is supply us with some serious levels of violence.

Schwa said...

Ignoring so much potential, "Alien vs. Predator" suck suck sucked. The only thing that would have made that movie worthwhile was when one of the predators and the last survivor were staring each other down at the end, with the knowing looks of deadly killers, his four prehensile clawteeth things just attached to her head and they started to suck face in a most romantic xenophilic way. At least it would then be obvious that the filmmakers were aiming for comedy. I'm still not sure.

I don't like the idea of this new one being a sequel to the previous piece of shit. Just start from scratch and be done with it... "Aliens vs. Predator: Do-Over" if you will.

Mike said...

Saw the trailer a week or so ago, I cant WAIT! I despised the first AvP but after seeing this trailer I will be first in line.

Al said...

Nuke 'em from space, it's the only way to be sure.

Fuckin' A.

Chez said...

Hudson... look into my eye.

Blade said...

Doesn't look like it's supposed to be a sequel to AvP, rather totally replacing the first one.

The only thing is that it's totally involving Earth in the now, it'd be way more awesome if it actually took place after Alien 4, when clone Ripley arrives back on Earth.

Of course, that'd also be WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY more expensive building an Earth set for ... 2400? isn't that when the Aliens movies take place?

oh well.

Lorenzo said...

From the looks of the trailer, this movie alone will surpass Freddy's body count. I love these warm fuzzy feelings I'm getting. . .

lakelady said...

all of a sudden you've got me wondering where my old stack of Heavy Metal magazines are.

Laser Rocket Arm said...

Thank Christ my husband's close to computer-illiterate because if he saw that trailer he'd be like a five-year-old hollering CAN WE GO? CAN WE GO? Let's put it this way--he liked the original AvP. The things I do for love ...

Anonymous said...

I don't know if you've been keeping up on current events, but "Aliens" was argueably the best sequel ever made.

And it survived with no weapons and no training.

And i can't believe you didn't mention that.

You're dogmeat pal...

now keep churning out the spirit food and the smackface desert

REEEspect
~Jaedon

sam paul said...

But... but... I LIKED AVP. :( It was just like the comic series...